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The Introverted Man’s Advantage in Attraction and Dating

The Introverted Man’s Advantage in Attraction and Dating

Being an introvert is often assumed to be some kind of handicap or limitation to men. But this could not be further from the truth. The fact is that extroverts and introverts both have unique strengths and weaknesses in dating. In many cases, an introvert will successfully seduce a woman where an extrovert fails. Here are some of the major advantages introverted men have:

Outcome independence
There is a basic level of outcome independence embedded into the introvert’s psyche. Being introverted means your energy comes from yourself. You aren’t as impressed or influenced by the external world as others. You don’t care as much about the outcome of a particular experience. Your validation naturally comes from within. As an introvert becomes more advanced in seduction, and he brings out his core identity as a man more fully, his minimal need for external validation becomes more apparent.

Self-reliance and self-direction
Introverts are automatically programmed to rely on themselves for happiness and satisfaction. In my case, I sometimes gain happiness from external experiences. But far more often, I feel true satisfaction when I accomplish something on my own – completing a piece of writing, developing a new idea or insight, creating a plan to pursue a goal, and so on. An introvert can be very satisfied on his own, with or without a woman by his side, because his inner world is so much more interesting. The fact that he has a powerful and complex life that he has built on his own is fundamentally sexy to women. A woman can easily be sucked into his world and utterly dominated by him emotionally and sexually.

Emotional depth
Emotional connection and comfort is essential for effective seduction. While an extraverted man may feel more comfortable in the excitement/ attraction phase of the process, an introvert can excel in constructing a powerful, deep connection to the girl. An introvert has a rich inner world of beliefs, ideas, experiences and passions to share with her, and he can use this to construct a solid bond. He just needs to learn to open up and share himself in a genuine way. Once he does, the results can be dramatic.

Less affected by social norms
In general, extroverted beginners have a harder time approaching, but an easier time once in conversation. For introverted beginners, it’s the opposite; they have it easier approaching, but harder in conversation. The reason for this is that introverts are less affected by social norms, which means it doesn’t bother them as much to do cold approaches. It’s usually not as big of a leap for them to break social norms by talking to a stranger. Because extroverts are more influenced and more sensitive to social norms, they have a harder time approaching. This is one area where being a bit socially dumb helps introverts. Not to say that it’s “easy” – no beginner has it easy – but it does seem to be easier for introverts on the approach.

I am certainly not saying being an extrovert is bad – far from it. Extroverts have natural strengths in other areas, such as: putting themselves out there, making new friends and acquaintances more easily, grabbing attention, and stoking that initial excitement and interest from girls. But being an introvert gives a man some very clear strengths and advantages in seduction.